Wednesday, October 22, 2008

How to Make the Best Pizza in the World - In 24 Hours

If you're here to learn the secret, then welcome to my guide for ultimate pizza construction. If you are here by mistake or do not desire to possess the necessary magic, then please read no further. Perhaps you'd prefer to read one of my other life changing pieces of insight.
To begin, one must first develop the succulent sauce - chefs get ready for this - which consists of a combination of unusual ingredients as well as a more conventional tomato base. Red cayenne peppers, which chromologically match the tomato, as well as add excessive amounts of heat, provide cohesion to the otherwise unstable basic ingredients. The end result is a sauce with a scoville rating of nearly 45,000 and a perfectly balanced mouthwatering masterpiece.
Now what? This is where I highly recommend a divergence from each of my readers. Toppings are not the key to omnipotence. However, if you prefer my opinion, use marinated grilled chicken with sliced green bell peppers and jalapenos. If you are beginning your journey with raw material, be sure to allow the chicken to properly rise above its freezing point and do not allow bacterial contamination between the ingredients, unless pasteurization processes are performed.
Next, the dough! I used a tube of pre-packaged pizza dough, simply because I did not have flour at the time and my attempts to make flour from backyard grass seed were severely inefficient and time consuming. Follow the instructions on the packaging to prepare the dough in the oven. Once it has reached a certain temperature the ingredients can be installed. From dough to surface the correct order of assembly is as follows: sauce, cheese, chicken, all other toppings, more cheese. And... that's it! Place the configured pizza into an oven and just sit back and relax, in a few minutes you too can exclaim, "I've made the best pizza in the world!"

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